“Avoiding sex had become part of our bedtime routine. Everything else in our relationship was great. It didn’t make sense!”

Keith, Relate Sex Therapy client

Where they started

Anne and Keith had been together for nine years but they started to hit problems with their sex life not long after the birth of their first child. Anne had a difficult birth and had to have an intrusive procedure which meant that she couldn’t have sex for several months. 

We didn't have sex for ages, even after Anne felt better, we barely managed to have sex more than once or twice a month. Neither of us were very happy about it, but we didn’t know what to do to change it.

Keith

Seeking help

Anne had read an article in a magazine about Sex Therapy at Relate and suggested to Keith that they try it, but like a lot of couples, they kept putting it off. Naturally they both felt unsure and a bit embarrassed about talking to someone else about sex. Eventually they rang up and booked an appointment.

We just went in with the attitude that a few blushes were better than a lifetime of frustration. We thought if we tried going a few times and it wasn’t for us then there was no obligation to keep going.

Anne

The Sex Therapist worked with Anne and Keith on a weekly basis to help them open up and talk about the problems they were having.

Our therapist was so friendly and relaxed about it, they deal with that stuff all the time, we wish we’d got in touch earlier. It ended up being a great decision. We became more comfortable talking to each other about the problems in our sex life. Our therapist helped us communicate better and gave us exercises to do at home.

Keith

Where they are now

It’s given us our intimacy back. It’s not just physical but emotional too – we’re so much better connected and really, really happy!

Anne

How we can help

If like Keith and Anne you feel like you need a bit of help with your sex life, there are various ways we can help.

*This case study is loosely based on the kind of scenarios we work with, as opposed to specific clients. Relate never shares the stories of our clients without permission, even with names and details changed.